Welcome from Pastor Patrick Curley

 

Getting the sniffles? Feeling a little lethargic? Can’t sleep, maybe you’re a little., irregular? Well, I might know what you have. It’s called Sundayitis or the Sabbath Flu. It is believed to be caused by the S-I-N virus. Nobody quite knows the origin for this illness that strikes particularly on Sunday mornings. Researchers think that it may have come over from Europe because this disease is rampant over there, We’ve only just recently seen it in the U.S. in the epidemic proportions that we have. It afflicts young and old, male and female with equal tenacity although it was first believed to predominate in males.

The symptoms of Sabbath Flu vary widely. People can be feeling perfectly fine all week long right up to a fun night out on Saturday. Then on Sunday morning, it hits. Some victims feel nauseous while others have headaches. Body aches in general are common as well as overall fatigue. There have been a few reported cases of extreme anxiety that victims feel they have a lot to get done right away that can’t wait another precious minute. Sundayitis always clears up by the afternoon of the same day such that patients can go right back to work or school on Monday morning; however, if the disease is left untreated, it can lead to extreme depression, loneliness. fear, despair and ultimately death.

There are no current records kept for public viewing on the death toll from Sabbath Flu. One professional simply put it this way, “The gateway is wide that leads to death.” Only the Ministry for Spiritual Health has certain numbers that they keep hidden away in the Book of Life. They don’t want to start a panic, I guess, or cause some to act differently toward others, Safer to just assume we all have been exposed to the S-I-N virus and are potential victims of Sundayitis.

But all is not lost. There is a cure. A medicine exists that has shown conclusive results. A weekly dose of the Gospel is all that is needed to fend off Sundayitis. It is administered both orally in the Sacrament of Holy Communion and audibly in the preaching of God’s Word. Apparently this medicine was developed from a blood cell of one that was immune to the S-I-N virus and thus beat death. He was a carpenter. He lived in Judea about 2,000 years ago and is still going strong. Even so, they say the cure is miraculous, even heaven sent. With regular doses of this Gospel medicine, patients can expect a full recovery from Sabbath Flu and rise to everlasting life. Other symptoms will also fade over time.

Some have tried to foolishly treat themselves with miserable results. They think by sleeping in they’ll lick Sabbath Flu and get their energy back. Others think a healthy dose of sun and fresh air may do the trick. So they go to the mountains or beach or try to get some exercise in some form or another. It never works though, for long. Oh sure, they may feel good for a while but Sundayitis eventually catches up with them and the symptoms all return: meaninglessness, irritability, hopelessness, apathy and the fear of death. Left unchecked, Sundayitis spreads throughout the body causing greed, hate, lust, covetousness and bitterness.

Don’t let Sundayitis get you. Free doses of the Gospel are given weekly at St John. Get dosed!


Pastor Curley